Conscious Mom

Yesterday Maia and I saw a caterpillar on the road. She picked it up, and fearing she would pinch it too hard, or put it in her mouth, I gently returned it to the ground. We watched it for a while, admiring its coloring and the way it moved so gracefully. A wonderful mother-daughter moment in nature, I stopped to think, just long enough to miss the opportunity to prevent disaster. I screamed 'no' and reached to move her away from the caterpillar, just a split second too late to prevent her foot from crashing down on it. She screamed when saw the remains of the caterpillar, complete with colorful fluid leaking out, and frantically said "more, more, more", while ...

I've collected some of my favorite quotes about peace for this year's Blog Blast for Peace. If you have any of your own quotes to share, please leave a comment. "It is isolation that is critical to war. You cannot be abusive when you realize your connectedness." -David Kadlec "If you have a gun, you can go out and shoot one, two, three, five people. But if you have an ideology and stick to it, thinking it is the absolute truth, you can kill millions." -Thich Nhat Hanh "War, at first, is the hope that one will be better off; next, the expectation that the other fellow will be worse off; ...

Sometimes I wonder if my heart will ever be big enough to embrace the extremes of human experience. Some friends are very close to becoming parents. (If you think I am talking about you, yes, I am!). The pace of referrals of children in our agency's Ethiopia program seems to have picked up and my friends are now much closer to beginning or enlarging their families. I am so excited for them I could jump out of my socks. Literally. When they announce their referrals, you will see some medium-sized women's socks floating down from northern New England- those will be mine. That's the one extreme. On the other is this: Ethiopia: WFP Cuts Assistance to Malnourished Children, Mothers. Apparently the ...

After several nights of little sleep, I'm staggering through the day on caffeine and protein powder. I'd love to know how intelligent design theory explains the teething process. When I am this tired, so tired I can't drive safely, get irritable over the smallest thing, can barely see straight, want to lie in bed and cry, I am tempted to write the day off as a waste. A shocking thing to notice myself thinking! Today is not a waste; here's why: - It is 75o and sunny, and I can sit in the sun and enjoy the warmth. - I can get all the housekeeping tasks done so that tomorrow (when I am better rested because it'll be Bodhi's turn to get up ...

Really. It's not. Maybe that's why it is my favorite form of exercise. Generally I am very good at not worrying about what anyone else is doing at yoga class. I work at my own edge, happy with my own progress. But there's one big exception to my no envy/no pride/no race-to-become-a-human-pretzel approach to yoga class: inversions. I've struggled with headstands and forearm stands for years. I can do a headstand against the wall, and a forearm stand only if someone lifts me into it, but I cannot do either on my own. Year after year, I watched new people join my yoga studio, learn to do perfect headstands, then forearm stands, while I balanced myself against ...

The founder of the Buddhist Order I am a member of had a teacher named Dhardo Rimpoche. Most people I know just refer to him as Dhardo. He was born in Tibet, but had to flee to India, as did many Tibetans, after the Chinese invaded. Once there he set up a school for Tibetan refugee children. Although I never met Dhardo I find a number of things about him fascinating and inspiring. According to Tibetan tradition, he was recognized early as a tulku, which means he was the rebirth of a lama or other highly realized practitioner, and taken to live in a monastery as a child. This is ...

Baby Yogini I entered this in The Twinkies Photo Contest for fun. You can see some adorable kid pictures there.

OK. So yesterday's post was a little harsh. I was still reeling from a particularly insensitive comment made in front of my daughter. Perhaps venting into a blog isn't the best way of dealing with my anger, however! I think much of the reason why I get angry is that I can never come up with a good response in the moment. When it comes to figuring out the perfect thing to say 48 hours later, I'm the queen, but at the precise moment I need the right words I just stand there frustrated and flabbergasted. I've been reflecting recently on the enormity of raising a child outside her birth culture. This is nothing new, there are certain aspects of parenting ...

I'm interrupting my retrospective to express concern for the people in Tibet, and wish for a peaceful, just solution to the decades of repression and conflict. This is Avalokiteshvara, the highest representation of compassion in Tibetan Buddhism. His image can be found throughout Tibet, and his mantra is carved into stones all over the countryside. Background to the China/Tibet situation can be found here. I'm not looking to discuss politics, so I've turned comments off for this post.

A few days ago I was putting Little M into her car seat after a trip to the grocery store. She was putting up great resistance, reaching for the ceiling, clinging to the headrest on the front seat, arching her back and refusing to bend her knees or waist. All the while, crying sorrowfully. I think I'd find it easier to cope with a furious tantrum than her 'why-has-such-misfortune-befallen-me? Whatever-I did-to-deserve-this-mistreatment-I am-very-very-sorry-mommy-please-stop' wail, complete with huge tears streaming down her cheeks. In the middle of this an older gentlemen called to me. "Excuse me, excuse me" he said more and more loudly until I could no longer ignore him. Thinking that only an extremely urgent situation would warrant interrupting a ...